My Stupid Hurt Feelings

I don't know what is wrong with me today, and really, every day since my birthday, but I reached some kind of tipping point in terms of what I am able to suppress, roughly at 10 am. It struck me, in the way I all of a sudden notice something that I have been trying to ignore, that my ex never wished me happy birthday, and that really started to piss me off. It set off my Anger Avatar, which just happens to look and sound exactly like Krazee-Eyez Killa from my favorite episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm. Outwardly, I looked pretty placid, but inside, my inner monologue was just a constant scroll of, "Muthafucka, whatthefuck?" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eC8V7uLoVko
I sent Gino a text message wishing him a happy birthday this year, and I invited him to my party, which he did not attend. I assumed he was too busy watching the Bruins-Canucks game, which was not surprising, but I was hoping I would see him since I hardly ever run into him anymore. I did everything a friend does for another friend. I got into an argument with my father wherein I defended Gino. I told my father that he was wrong to pass judgement on someone he, truly, barely knows, and how I know he doesn't understand, but that Gino was my best friend for seven years and how I don't want to just let go of that because everyone thinks I should. I know it's just my hurt pride taking over, but god, it's really embarrassing to tell a 68-year-old man, "You're wrong! We can still be best friends! Everything is FINE!", and then find out a few days later that he was right, that Gino and I can't be as close as we used to be. My father is always right, and it still annoys me. My dad makes up for it, though, by never pointing out that he is always right, and then doing something adorable, like leaving a Facebook post on my timeline that begins, "Hey, girlfriend-" and then sending me tulips at work for my birthday.
I sent Gino a text, not so much angry as it was passive-aggressive, and he responded with a confused one, a message that basically amounted to, "What?"
Come to find out, he was distracted this week. A friend of his passed away, a friend his age, from cancer, and he didn't think to congratulate me on, oh, being born. Surprise, everyone, I'm a jerk.
I did my best to lower myself to the floor, tell him I'm here for him, and if he needs anything, please tell me. I called him out for being a shitty friend and acted, in turn, like an even shittier one. I overreacted, as I tend to do, and now I'm just trying to get him to forget that I did that. It isn't easy. Nothing about this is easy. Getting older and finding that I still act like a child is not easy. Hoping for some kind of acknowledgement from the person I used to expect it from, and not getting it, is not easy. Admitting that my father still knows best is not easy. I'm pretty good, though, with not easy. At least, I think I am. I'll keep finding out if that's true.